CLOSURE

Letting go of something treasured sometimes leaves us at a difficult cross-road. Looking left, right, left again, right again and weighing all the options, possibilities and outcomes. Scared of what one may bring and what the other may not. It’s over-whelming and though we know we have to do it, it seems all to much.

Over the weekend I knew choices had to be made. Closure choices. Ones which would hurt but were necessary.  And then it came. The moment that assured me that it’s alright to close a chapter, a dear one. As I sat with my earphones on and my bright laptop screen starting back at me; a rush of calm settled my soul and I knew that it was time. A time to wrap memories tight, of not only love but another life, and open up the road to new ones. 

I think we subconsciously fear that if we close a chapter, we forget or erase the times. That there’s no hope that it’ll be a reality again. But it will. As life goes on a moves forward, new memories are waiting with their own times for closure. 

It’s just reaching that moment when you know it’s alright and that it’ll all be ok.

That moment, over GLITTER

I often worry about us creative minds (Some people say we have a short attention span, we don't... ooooh... Glitter!), the way we think, what makes us tick, what rocks our boat or that a sheet of paper can just make our week and stop us in our tracks.

The office was unusually quiet – all were engrossed in designs, emails, cutting, foiling... focused on ensuring the constant deadlines were going to be met. 

And then a delivery. A simple paper delivery which broke the silence and shifted the focus. 

But from the brown paper bag came the most spectacular glittering copper which made us all jump from our seats and huddle over the 30 x 30 cm square. Shining beams reflecting from the spotlights above. Giggles, smiles and “totes ridic” expressions were all around as the 4 designers had a glitter-gasm over the proud paper. 

Strange – perhaps. But a moment ‘creatives’ only seem to grasp and revel in. A moment which solidified how much I adore my career and that it truly is the simple things in life.

Let your light shine, no matter what.

Blossoming Souls

PHOTO CREDIT www.cocorrina.com

HeartBREAK

Since writing my blog, I’ve always found comfort in the luxury that I can be open and honest about current , personal, and emotional affairs. That my opinion can be expressed with no judgment, agree or disagreement, or open a thoughtful discussion. But one subject I just cannot seem to open up about is heartbreak. Enough said right? No elaboration required.

It’s an intense and very personal emotion which takes over the soul and mind. We’ve all had the mis-fortune of being broken and feeling we will never mend again. But when you’re sitting with it, your world is consumed by a blurred cloud which sits comfortably for a while. Only to be lifted by your own doing.

Over the past few days my emotions and anxiety have been high – attempting to keep a brave face and hide the reality. Some days it worked, others not so much. But between this wave, I found a strength I didn’t think I could muster during this time. And in turn I put a plan into action for moving forward. To take this and twist it into something powerful with only the good, beautiful, sweet memories in hand and the gratefulness for being a part of someone’s life for an extensive period of time. And though secretly I’d love to indent myself on a couch for days and watch horribly emotionally saturated movies surrounded by chocolate wrappers and empty ice-cream tubs . . . I cannot muster to do so.

Instead I want to distract my mind and focus on myself for a little while.

Explaining BEAUTYY

I was asked over the weekend by a six year old why I wear so much make up. The question took me completely by surprise and I knew I needed to answer in a way that would not only resonate with her but inspire her too. 

In an instant, my mind spanned a million thoughts and I peered into every avenue with alternative answers. I needed to get this one right. I needed to make sure that my answer was the right one, and an important one. Even more important than the answer to win a million dollars on a tacky game show which a host wearing too much hair product. As my answer was part of an ongoing self-esteem issue which affects millions of girls, boys, woman and men on a daily basis. One which is heavily influenced by the media and those around us.

My inner answer steered me into my own insecurities and the security of being able to hide behind the make up. But I couldn’t tell her that. But what I did tell her, surprised even me. I told her that every person is beautiful and deserves to feel that way everyday. I told her that I wear make up because it makes me feel beautiful and special in my own way. I told her that one day she will find her own way to make herself feel beautiful and that it can be anything but that she had to remember that she was beautiful no matter what.

She paused and then turned to me with a wonderful smile and said, “well, I think you are beautiful no matter what anyone else says,” The innocence filled my heart and though I may not believe her words myself, it made me feel beautiful and I hoped that my words would hold true for her forever.

GRATEFULNESS & HOPE

You know when you bump into someone you have not seen in years and the reunion seems almost overwhelming due to the disbelief. On my spontaneous visit to my cousin, I was reunited with a fellow ex-coworker from one of my first “big girl” jobs. I was working as a receptionist | PA and dear Pinky was our  in-house company house keeper. Keeping our areas spotless and our mugs filled with delicious coffee. 

There was never a day that went by that she never had a smile on her face and her wonderful energy was contiguous. And all these years later, it’s still very apparent.

Her children are now all grown up, with children of their own, and she continues to have hope that her and her children’s lives will turn around. And in turn, I realize how fortunate I have been and am still, as my life has taken many paths, twists and turns, but hers has remained the same with the similar struggle to millions in this country.

But yet, she still smiles and continues to have hope.

Pancakes, Nutella & HAPPINESS

I had the opportunity to spend time with my 3 beautiful nieces on Saturday. After a spontaneous call to my cousin, I rode out to the Southern suburbs (which often feel like I need a passport to get to or a manual to understand) and spent the afternoon with some of my favorite people.

Over the years, I have watched them grow up from a distance. Seeing their beautiful smiles through my laptop or phone screen and feeling a heart wrenching pull of not being there. I was very fortunate to spend a few vacations with them when they made the long haul to Orlando and treasured every moment knowing that the next time I saw them, they’d be new people in an essence.

But with incredible guidance and nurturing from their parents, they have all grown up into inspiring, individualistic, strong girls with the most immense spirits, immaculate manners and beautiful souls. They assure me that there will be good people on this earth and that they will and do teach us all something.

The afternoon was simple and relaxed yet filled my heart with warmth and happiness. From making pancakes (naturally I didn’t have any input with this besides licking nutella off a spoon whilst the cooking and eating occurred) to huddling all together on the couches watching a family movie, I felt at peace and drawn to the beauty and love they exude. 

It was exactly what my soul needed.

MARCH MADNESS Mix

This months music mix, March Madness, reflects long work hours discovering new music, new artists and new memories. Enjoy it and make the most of the madness March brings.

March Madness from The Lucky Locket on 8tracks Radio.